Posts Tagged ‘My Writing…’

I’ll get there.

Um, a little help please...

I’ve been thinking alot…and I’ve made some mistakes in the past.

And I admit it.

I’ve had some fun, and I admit it.

But the concept of what I am now needs to change.

Some factors of who I am , I enjoy and I will try my best to maintain.

But today , I let the darker side out and just didn’t like what I saw.

I’ve decided that it is almost time for me to get a new puppy.

Not yet, but close.

…

As for Radiothon preparations, I am nowhere where I NEED to be, but this weekend I’ll get there.

I’ve been putting things off, but I’ll get there.

I’ve been lucky to have a good woman who is by me supporting me, encouraging me.

And because of her I’ll get there.

…

I’ve let myself down by trying to make excuses, but I’ve been wrong.  I’ve had my personal defcon set to 4 for too long.  I’ve let people in my life that have hurt me and have taken advantage of my willingness to help.  They’ve taken something I’ve loved and destroyed it. So I’m going to work on this project after I get back from Ireland.

Hopefully when I return, I will have found the will to take back The Castle and finally get it on track to publishing it.

I’ve got to thank my family, Joanna, Rich, Jim, Dusty, and the people who’ve had my back.

…

But since I’m making progress on losing weight, seeing a number on the scale that I haven’t seen since before I got divorced, I’m going to keep going, keep pushing myself.

I know I’m hard on myself, but I have great hopes, dreams and wishes.

That will all come true.

…

I talked to my life coach today and he made recommendations, some will come easy, some will be hard to achieve.  But every little goal I’ve set, I’ve made.

Now it’s time to stop hiding and make those goals that I can only dream of achieving.

…
Every day I talk to Shelby I realize that she is no longer my little girl, the one I palmed in my hand, the one I gave baths in the kitchen sink.  She’s a tween, and asking me questions that I am not qualified to answer and I feel uncomfortable thinking about.

But I miss her.

When Ryan wants to talk to me, which is still few and far between, as he is momma’s boy, he is a motormouth, he just jabbers away.  Then there are other times where he is quiet and withdrawn, with one word answers and crying.

I miss him.

But I am approaching the hardest decision of my life…

and I’m so confused.

I wish I could tell you about what it is about, but I know that the blog is monitored and I just can’t sacrifice my privacy for your input.

…

3 weeks from Ireland and Mom sent me 4 new polo shirts so I “have clean nice things for the trip”. You can watch a boy become a man, but to a mother, he will always be a boy.

I’m scared and yet excited, I check my passport every day. It amazes me that I’ve gone 38 years without even sniffing leaving the USA but now with the passport I think of reasons every day to leave.

I could go visit my friends Mark and Chris in Canada.  I could see the city of London, Rome, I’ll pass on Paris for now.

I just have to step out of my comfort zone.

…

I guess that’s what this post has all been about.

I’m stuck.

Brian Regan…

Well tonight Jo and I went to see Brian Regan at the Civic Center.

Funny guy but was more impressed with the opening act Kermit Apio!

Jo and I went to Buffalo Wild Wings cause I was craving buffalo wings and I’ve been good on my diet that I started after the surgery.

We came home and watched the new Burn Notice and decided that Saturday we’d clean the garage and I’d spend 3 hours doing nothing but writing.

I miss writing, but I have been working on some projects and spending more time thinking and writing stuff that I don’t want anyone to read.

The sites on my stomach are getting better I just need to give them more time.  I heal fast, but I’m so damn impatient.

Still waiting for my “revised” passport to show up.  Still surprised when I sent a New York birth certificate that they would put Lubbock, TX as my birthplace.  Hell, I love this place but sheesh.

Hoping my friends are doing well.  I’ve been lurking around, busy at work, my busy time of year preparing for my major event.  Then I get to go to Ireland.

I think the hard work will pay off.

Until tomorrow,

sd

Weekend update…

When our hero last left you, he was dealing with the staple sites becoming infected. "Oh yes, Sean, I have you now. I will make you itch and miserable. BRING ON THE PUS AND BLOOD!" "Now wait a min, I've been miserable, 5 years worth, and I don't think you can do this ole Satan!" I laughed at him. Now in hindsight, laughing at Satan and trying to go a weekend with infected staple sites wasn't the best idea.

Read more...

Booking a trip…

Today, I did something for me.  Now some people will be concerned, some will be mad.  Personally, I really don’t care.  Because I booked today a trip out of the United States of America.  No, it wasn’t to Canada, I was tempted to see my friends north of the border, but instead I think I may go over the pond to see ancestors.

Dates and further notices to be announced at a date when I give a damn, but right now I want to tell you  story:

The princess slept as this prince slept near her, guarding her, for no one would hurt his sister on his watch.  The princess dreamt of presents and of finding the one man of her dreams, the prince dreamt of mighty battles and vanquishing evil.

And the King watched over his two charges and looked with a smile and a tear.  His charges were not small anymore, they tried to solve their problems without involving the king, but sometimes their arguments brought down the house. 

The Princess was the oldest and wanted all of the things done first because, she was the oldest and that’s how it was supposed to be, and of course she was a tween.

The Prince was the youngest and wanted all the things for him done first, because unlike the princess, he never knew his father, just coming over twice a year didn’t build a relationship with him.

The King tried his best to make their time with him in his kingdom a happy time, some times he ruled for the princess, and some times he ruled for the prince.

But he saw his time on this earth coming to an end, not today, tomorrow but years down the line.  He wanted to make sure that he taught his charges the right from wrong and helping others.

Times the old king dreamed would come faster, seem to come at a price.  Each time he saw his princess and prince, he was older, wiser and greyer.  His prince was handsome, and his princess a wonder and all he thought was the times he wasn’t there, running his kingdom, trying to help out the prince and princess.  Each time they came it felt like it would be the last.

But then one day as he lay in the infirmary, he knew that he wouldn’t be there forever and tried to tell them often how he felt.

But then sometimes young princes and princesses hear the words and yet don’t understand the true meaning.

I love you my prince and princess.  May your dreams be filled with treasure, learning gallore, may you find the one who loves you without pause and may you find everlasting happiness with your charges.

Love,

Your King.

Protected: FICTION: I know everything…