A recent study by a female observer of man showed that there are many of the “nice guys” that women claim not to be able to find for many reasons. One of the reasons stated was that men were all assholes. But Dr. Stephanie has found research that shows that this is not true. Sean Donahue from member station KONE in Lubbock, Texas reports:

Technical name: guyus goodus some refer to him as also geekus maximus and avius techius was once thought to be an extinct species. Recent proof was discovered by the Texas Wreck School of Male Studies that proved that this was wrong.

I discussed it with Dr. Stephanie Womenright of the Texas Wreck School of Male Studies about her recent discovery:

Sean: So you were talking to this one male that was in your trial group

Stephanie: Anyway I was talking relationships and all (he hasn’t had a girlfriend in quite a long time)He says he’s tired of being the nice guy because all the girls go for the total asshole losers.

Sean: Sounds familiar

Stephanie: He tried being an ass and it didn’t get him anywhere. He stays the nice guy and it really doesn’t get him anywhere, they all just want to be his friend

Sean: So he tried being the bad guy and couldnt get chicks either. Hmm that’s interesting

Stephanie: He can’t figure it out either. I thought it was funny

Sean: So after further testing you discovered that there are good guys left on the earth for women?

Stephanie: Yup

Sean: So did you give him any tips?

Stephanie: I told him No, no, no… I and a few others want a NICE guy, that’s what we’re looking for but the NICE guys are too busy trying to be assholes because they think that’s what we want!

Sean: SO why can’t nice guys find women who want them

Stephanie: I dunno.. same reason he can’t, I suppose

Stephanie: You’re both terrific guys… I don’t understand it myself

Sean: I guess you’ll have to discover it in your next project.

So the nice guys are out there women, go and get em. For TPR News, I’m Sean Donahue in Lubbock

3 thoughts on “Research well worth the cost…

  1. Every aspect of my work is strictly for research purposes. I have a few openings for new candidates, currently. Do you know anyone that might want to participate in my studies of the male *cough* jerk mind?

    Sean Replies: “Ah the test I’m dreading. ‘Sir, you won’t feel a thing. Uh then why do I feel something and both of your hands are on my shoulders?'”

  2. HAHAHAHA! That is hillarious!! Good work, Mr. Donahue. 😀

    Dr. Stephanie Womenright
    Office Hours: Monday – Friday 4am – 10pm
    After hours: Call 911.

    Sean Replies: “Hmm her office hours start for happy hours. Coincidence? I think not! And she’s examining male body parts….
    Purely for research”

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